DREADPUBLISHING: John Heard Policy Magazine Kwame Anthony Appiah The Ethics Of Identity + Being Heard Gays Sons
[UPDATE] The US Conference of Catholic Bishops has released a new film to attract men to the priesthood. With scenes of triumph and martyrdom and a no-nonsense focus on the daily realities of service, hardship and sanctity, it's an absolute winner:
[UPDATE] The O.C. spoof The B.C., made by a bunch of Boston College students and a Jesuit priest, makes a splash. Ignatius' exhortation, 'go set the world aflame' is one of their motivations.
[UPDATE] Roger Cardinal Mahony of Los Angeles reminds the US, via The New York Times, that:
:: Go West ::
At long last DREADNOUGHT can post the first of my Op-Eds from The Record in Perth. In the near future I'll post the second (differences and similarities between JPII and BXVI) and third (Gypsies, Transsexuals and a Church that reaches out to same sex attracted men).
This one's for my magnificent US DREADNOUGHTERS, who've been so patient while waiting for it and who continue to read this silly blog despite my manifest shortcomings.
:: BEING HEARD: Straight or Gay - He's Always Your Son ::
- The Record Newspaper February 5, 2006
Many young men feel they can 'get away' with otherwise poor behaviour because in the sphere of influence closest to their sexual experiences, there is no moral mentor to audit their actions. Parents of same sex attracted young men must not abdicate this responsibility.
What would I tell a Catholic parent who suspects his/her son is gay?
Don’t wait for your son to approach you. Sit down with him and ask - lovingly, firmly – if he is same sex attracted. Don’t get discouraged if he lies at first. Continue to assure him that if he were same sex attracted you’d still love him. Even if he passes for the most robust heterosexual on earth, if you have your doubts, no doubt he does too. You know your son. It is far better to overcome transitory shyness and confront the issue head on.
If you don’t, your son might resent you later and you’ll miss out on an opportunity to play a key role – as you should – in his adult flourishing. You might also come to regret it. So many parents marvel as their sons transform from devout, subtle boys into angry, militant activists all too ready to parrot the latest anti-Catholic slogans.
This regrettable change, however, is – if not totally preventable, at least foreseeable.
Same sex attracted young men know how to find each other. Chances are that your son, if he is ‘gay’, will have visited internet sites that allow him to chat with and eventually meet other males. He might have sought out gay pornography. Whatever you think you know about the internet your son almost certainly knows more.
It is imperative that you don’t let these influences supervene on your relationship. Your son must know that there is no gulf between you, that no matter what he’s going through he is still called to a life worthy of Christ.
'My mother does not understand’ or ‘Dad won’t talk to me about it’ are excuses that become justifications. There is no light in the closet and sin multiplies in the darkness. Add to this the depravity that swirls around gay bars and the eroticism that animates much of gay culture and continuing to ignore or deny your son's sexual inclinations becomes a deficit in love.
Further, it is much remarked that ‘out’ same sex attracted men often become ‘tired of the gay scene’ and return to a more stable life. A secret shame, a private sin, is more appealing than the flabby mediocrity that actually characterises the ‘gay community’.
That's why, for you son’s sake, you must direct him toward honesty.
He also needs to know, because this is what the Church teaches, that there is nothing wrong with him simply because he feels attracted to other males. He needs to know that, like any other Catholic, he will be judged on his actions.
Ultimately, for those wounded by the Light, there can be no deliberate darkness. And no closet on earth can withstand the power of truth and love.
(c) 2006 John Heard, All Rights Reserved.
:: Cosmopolitans, Sans Stemware ::
DREADNOUGHT's review of Kwame Anthony Appiah's The Ethics of Identity was published today in the Centre for Independent Studies' Policy Magazine - Autumn '06 edition.
It's on sale at newsstands across Australia. I'll post it in full after an appropriate embargo period.
:: The Upshot ::
There isn't one today. Just read my piece and comment on it. Oh and have a ripper day!
"You have to be a real man if you wanna become a priest."DREADNOUGHT cannot imagine a more succinct summary of the Vatican Instruction on homosexual seminarians. A conference on vocations is to be held alongside the film launch. If any DREADNOUGHTER have ever wondered if he's called: my God man you are. Go out and be fishers of men. The Church needs you.
[UPDATE] The O.C. spoof The B.C., made by a bunch of Boston College students and a Jesuit priest, makes a splash. Ignatius' exhortation, 'go set the world aflame' is one of their motivations.
[UPDATE] Roger Cardinal Mahony of Los Angeles reminds the US, via The New York Times, that:
"Denying aid to a fellow human being violates a law with a higher authority than Congress — the law of God."Hurrah for the Antigone of the Angelenos! Now he just has to sack those tiresome liturgical campers, sorry, dancers...
:: Go West ::
At long last DREADNOUGHT can post the first of my Op-Eds from The Record in Perth. In the near future I'll post the second (differences and similarities between JPII and BXVI) and third (Gypsies, Transsexuals and a Church that reaches out to same sex attracted men).
This one's for my magnificent US DREADNOUGHTERS, who've been so patient while waiting for it and who continue to read this silly blog despite my manifest shortcomings.
:: BEING HEARD: Straight or Gay - He's Always Your Son ::
- The Record Newspaper February 5, 2006
Many young men feel they can 'get away' with otherwise poor behaviour because in the sphere of influence closest to their sexual experiences, there is no moral mentor to audit their actions. Parents of same sex attracted young men must not abdicate this responsibility.
What would I tell a Catholic parent who suspects his/her son is gay?
Don’t wait for your son to approach you. Sit down with him and ask - lovingly, firmly – if he is same sex attracted. Don’t get discouraged if he lies at first. Continue to assure him that if he were same sex attracted you’d still love him. Even if he passes for the most robust heterosexual on earth, if you have your doubts, no doubt he does too. You know your son. It is far better to overcome transitory shyness and confront the issue head on.
If you don’t, your son might resent you later and you’ll miss out on an opportunity to play a key role – as you should – in his adult flourishing. You might also come to regret it. So many parents marvel as their sons transform from devout, subtle boys into angry, militant activists all too ready to parrot the latest anti-Catholic slogans.
This regrettable change, however, is – if not totally preventable, at least foreseeable.
Same sex attracted young men know how to find each other. Chances are that your son, if he is ‘gay’, will have visited internet sites that allow him to chat with and eventually meet other males. He might have sought out gay pornography. Whatever you think you know about the internet your son almost certainly knows more.
It is imperative that you don’t let these influences supervene on your relationship. Your son must know that there is no gulf between you, that no matter what he’s going through he is still called to a life worthy of Christ.
'My mother does not understand’ or ‘Dad won’t talk to me about it’ are excuses that become justifications. There is no light in the closet and sin multiplies in the darkness. Add to this the depravity that swirls around gay bars and the eroticism that animates much of gay culture and continuing to ignore or deny your son's sexual inclinations becomes a deficit in love.
Further, it is much remarked that ‘out’ same sex attracted men often become ‘tired of the gay scene’ and return to a more stable life. A secret shame, a private sin, is more appealing than the flabby mediocrity that actually characterises the ‘gay community’.
That's why, for you son’s sake, you must direct him toward honesty.
He also needs to know, because this is what the Church teaches, that there is nothing wrong with him simply because he feels attracted to other males. He needs to know that, like any other Catholic, he will be judged on his actions.
Ultimately, for those wounded by the Light, there can be no deliberate darkness. And no closet on earth can withstand the power of truth and love.
(c) 2006 John Heard, All Rights Reserved.
:: Cosmopolitans, Sans Stemware ::
DREADNOUGHT's review of Kwame Anthony Appiah's The Ethics of Identity was published today in the Centre for Independent Studies' Policy Magazine - Autumn '06 edition.
It's on sale at newsstands across Australia. I'll post it in full after an appropriate embargo period.
:: The Upshot ::
There isn't one today. Just read my piece and comment on it. Oh and have a ripper day!
by DREADNOUGHT at 7:25:00 PM
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